These words are hard for me to write and even harder for me to say. I’m not for everyone. Why is this simple phrase so difficult for me to accept? That’s the work that I’m doing for myself. Why is it so hard to accept that it is okay that I’m not for everyone? It’s my fear of rejection.

Hello. If we haven't met before, my name is Michele and I am a life and success coach utilizing my experience as a certified online business manager to help female entrepreneurs achieve their goals, their visions, their dreams, so they can live a good life and actually have time to enjoy it.

Figuring it out

I’ve been able to pinpoint my fear of rejection to two major life events.

1. My Dad
2. Getting Laid Off From My Job

My parents married young and were divorced by the time I hit second grade. It’s not an uncommon childhood story. Lots of kids live this exact same thing. But, why has my story led me to believe that I need to be accepted by everyone? Instead of embracing that I’m not for everyone.

When I think about my dad, my first thought is, ‘spending time with her is not as fun as spending time in the bar with my friends.’ I know the exact memory that has caused this thinking.

My brother and I were waiting for our dad to pick us up to spend the weekend with him. It wasn’t often that we went to spend time with him and I was super excited, only to be let down.

My brother and I waited with our little bags packed. We waited and waited but he never came.

Later that evening, in our one-bedroom house, I overheard my Mom talking to my Dad and he was too busy having fun at the bar to get us. He was too busy having fun.

I was like 7 at the time. That memory, and even writing it out, now brings tears to my eyes. My thoughts: I'm not fun enough to be around. Partying is more fun than spending time with me.

The second was getting laid off from my job.

Really, the whole conversation is a blur in my head now. My boss had set a meeting with me. Which I was very thankful for because I had a number of outstanding items that I needed to discuss with him.

My chipper hello was quickly chased away with his cold uncaring voice telling me that someone from HR was on the phone and he would transfer me to review my severance package. The sales department was going through a restructuring. My position has been eliminated and I was now being laid off effective immediately.

Rejected. Not good enough.

Flipping the script

It’s funny because my heart knows that it was God, actually protecting me. He was protecting me from a Dad that didn’t know how to really love and care for his kids. Now I know, he was hurting and was wrapped up in his own mind drama. Spending time with him would not have been healthy. The Lord was protecting me from a job that I didn’t love that made me toxic.

But in my mind, it felt like rejection. It felt like I’m not enough, someone or something else is better than me. But the truth is, I’m not for everyone. And that’s okay! I am me, I have a purpose, a mission, a destiny. I am daily evolving into who I was created to be.

Now, in the middle between who I was and who I will become, is right and good. We are who we need to be in every moment of our lives, this is the gift of God that we learn and we grow and get to experience all the stages of our lives in living color.

I’m not for everyone, but I’m here for those that I’m destined to cross paths. I am good enough and this knowledge brings meaning and purpose to my life.

This is me working through my baggage. I really hope it helps someone else work through their baggage too.

✁ Just a Snippet

Here is just a snippet of the important points, you know for the skimmer in you. 🤪

• I’m not for everyone. Why is this simple phrase so difficult for me to accept?
• My thought, that’s exactly what I need. I’m currently an OBM, how do I make money as a life and success coach?
• It’s uncovering my baggage that I keep hidden in the back of my mind.
• My thoughts were saying, you need to be like someone else. If you are not being yourself it is okay if people reject you.
• I’ve been able to pinpoint my fear of rejection to two major life events.
• It’s funny because my heart knows that it was God, actually protecting me.
• But in my mind, it felt like rejection.

Are you caught in a trap that you can't put your work out there into the online business world until it's perfect? Why? Who says it’s not perfect? Really what exactly is perfect anyways? What if you started to believe that complete beats perfect.

Take the leap of faith

What if you take the leap of faith, and trust that God has you’re back? That’s what I had to do.

I had to believe that I could be an entrepreneur. I had to believe in myself, I had to believe enough for my husband who kindly supported me in the first few years when I fumbled around.

Here’s my big secret, my mantra.

Business is easy when I take messy imperfect action.

What is perfect?

But, here’s the thing and I've said it time and time again, my idea of perfect and your idea of perfect are two different things.

What?

You guessed it we both have two different perceptions and ideas on what perfect should be.

So what is my point? What are you not getting done or putting out there because you feel it's not up to your standard?

Someone else shoes

For a minute put yourself in someone elses shoes.

What if your offer as it is right now is what your dream client is needing.

Do you find that the right people are brought to you at the right time for where you are in your business?

When you stop getting tangled up in the little thing, running a business is a heck of a lot easier.

Shift from perfect

What if you shifted your mindset to consider everything as a work in progress? Instead of holding back, putting it out into the world as the starting point, and be satisfied adopt the thinking complete beats perfect.

Here is the magic, give yourself permission for revisions.

Doesn't it feel different to look at it from a new perspective? When you giving yourself permission for revisions, it changes your thinking.

It shifts your thinking on how you want to actually do and achieve those goals and projects.

Why not test it for yourself. Get curious and put something out there when it's almost perfect. Take the feedback and revise it to be better than before. Everything in business is a work in progress and complete beats perfect.

✁ Just a Snippet

Here is just a snippet of the important points, you know for the skimmer in you. 🤪

• Why completion is better than perfect.
• If you’re striving for perfect then you’re still tinkering around with whatever you’re working on and it will never be finished to your satisfaction.
• Get it done, put it out there.
• Business is easy when you take messy imperfection action, is my mantra.
• I've said this time and time again my idea of perfect could be really different than your idea of perfect.
• Stop trying so hard, make it easy on yourself
• What if you considered everything a work in progress?
• Does that change your thinking?