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Not Doing Enough

Not Doing Enough

Do you know that feeling when your brain is stuck, spinning in the thoughts of I'm not doing enough, I should be doing so much more. Oh, if you are not familiar with those thoughts, please talk to me in the comments below because I would love to hear your secret and how you’ve overcome this thought pattern. 

How you show up

That nagging feeling that you should be doing more? You are triggering your thoughts and feelings of not doing enough. Do you wonder how that causes you to show up? 

As an example, are you showing up in a hurry? Is it causing you to show up distracted? Consequently, is it causing you to show up distant and preoccupied with the long list of other things you should be doing more of?

As a result, you're not fully present at that moment. 

Where is your mind trap? 

I want you to go ahead and take a step back and look at your thoughts. What areas in your life do you feel as if you are not doing enough and you should be doing more? 

Undoubtedly, we get into the mind trap of I'm not doing enough. I should be doing more—all of those guilty thoughts spin in your mind. 

Meanwhile, you're thinking I'm not spending enough time with my spouse, partner, or significant other, whoever that is for you. Questioning, am I spending enough time with my children? Maybe you’re holding onto the guilt of not spending enough time with your parents? 

You’re likely an adult child with a very busy family of your own, but still, you hold onto that guilt that you are not doing enough. Nevertheless, those thoughts cycle through your brain on repeat.

Recycling the thought of Not Doing Enough

They're constantly recycling. I can guarantee when you do that; you are not feeling all warm and fuzzy inside.

Nope. 

When you recycle those beliefs, when you have them on repeat in your head, they will leave you feeling stressed and probably guilty. 

Why, for what purpose do those negative thoughts and feelings serve you? What if, instead of circling the drain question, am I doing enough. What if you decide to believe that it is enough for who you are right now and at this time in your life. It is okay, give yourself permission and decide you are doing enough. 

Maybe in the future, you'll be able to give more. However, you are completely tapped out at this time in your life.

You have nothing else to give to anyone else. Trying to give and give is causing you to attempt to pour from an empty cup.

The Guilt of Not Doing Enough

And we all know that we can't do that. 

We can't pour from an empty cup. We need to take care of ourselves first before taking care of others. 

And it never turns out well, as it's impossible to keep that up for the long term, you may be able to do it for a little while, but in the end, at some point, you have to decide it is enough. 

And let me tell you, once that decision is made, yes, this is enough. 

This is enough. I don't need to do anymore. 

We show up differently. We feel lighter, happier, and more present. Think about how much better you'll feel when spending time with your family, spouse, children, or parents.

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Little Side Note

Really take a look at your life. Where else do you need to decide that you’re doing enough? ​

Fully Present

You will be fully present for them because you know in your heart that you are doing enough for who you are right now this moment. Because now when you show up and spend time with them fully present. 

Rather than guilt, you come at it from the feeling of pure happiness and joy because now you are allowing yourself to truly, genuinely enjoy those precious moments with your loved ones. 

So the next time, friends, you find your brain begins to swim, swim in the thoughts that I'm not doing enough. I want you to pause and step back. Instead of thinking of how you are not doing enough, I want you to give yourself grace. 

And I want you to decide that what you’re doing right now is enough. 

If your life feels like it's spinning entirely out of control and you're in that constant cycle of I'm not doing enough, I should be doing more. I get it. I got you. So together, in six months, we can talk about all of these things and stop that endless spinning for you. Yes, your life is meant to be enjoyed. I invite you to apply for my private coaching. The link is down below. I'll see you back here next week. Thank you so much for your time. I appreciate you, and you have a great week.

Private Coaching

Why do I believe in the power of private coaching?

Because it is truly life-changing. When your coach asks you that mind-blowing question that suddenly allows you to see what you've been missing all along that was literally right in front of your face.

You just need someone with a different perspective to help you see it.

Are you ready to experience life from a different perspective?

Find Balance Digital Download
Change Your Negative Thinking

Change Your Negative Thinking

What’s your attitude towards yourself? What is your self-image? How do you approach life? Do you view things from a half-empty or half-full perspective? Do you believe that you can change your negative thinking and negative self-talk?

Would you like to become a person that views life from a positive thinking and positive self-talk perspective?

What are the benefits of overcoming negative thinking?

Are you wondering if there are any benefits to overcoming negative thinking and negative self-talk? I’m so glad you ask. According to an article from Mayo Clinic, The positive thinking that usually comes with optimism is a key part of effective stress management. And effective stress management is associated with many health benefits. I agree when they say you can learn positive thinking skills if you tend to be pessimistic, don’t despair.

Link to the article.

Sweet, I think that’s good news is you can absolutely learn positive thinking skills. 

Along with positive thinking will come positive self-talk.

You change from the inside out, which begins with shifting your negative thinking and self-talk to kinder, positive thinking and self-talk.

Your Words Matter

Words Matter – What do you say to yourself that you would not say to others. 

What words are your nemesis? Even if you’re using positive words, what is your energy with these words? Do you use positive words, but have a negative feeling while saying them. This too will shift as your self-image shifts.

Your Judgement 

Begin to pay attention to the thoughts of judgment that you have for yourself or for others. 

This will shine a light on the areas of your negative thinking. Give yourself grace, we can’t always control our first thought, but we can control all the thoughts following that. Please do not be ashamed of yourself or your thoughts.

Change Your Negative Thinking and Negative Self-Talk

Shift the Old Patterns

Shifting the old patterns of negative self-talk and thinking begins with awareness. It is a decision to no longer speak to yourself negatively. What if you drop the old pattern of negative self-talk? Look for ways to flip the script in your head from the negative to the positive. Be patient. This is a practice. 

Here are a few examples of how to do this.

  • I’m not able to change. Shift it, too I’m willing to give change a try.
  • I don’t know how to do it. Shift it to That’s okay, I may not know right now, and I’m figuring it out. The answers are coming. The answers always come.
    • I know for sure that this one works, as I use it. It was given to me by my coach and I’m giving it to you to try out. 
  • Pause and get clear about why you're speaking to yourself in a negative matter.
  • Take notice of your self-talk.
  • You’ll be more aware as you pay attention to your patterns. The things that trigger you into negative thinking and self-talk.
  • Pay attention to your repeat or nagging questions. Turn your question into a sentence. That’s your thought error. It’s essential to notice your thoughts.
  • Practice positive thinking. Begin to create a habit of positive thinking.

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Little Side Note

Remember who you are. You are special. Don’t let yourself talk you out of that.

Self Love

Have you heard of Mirror Work before? If not, please let me introduce you to the late Louise Hay and Mirror Work. Lousie says that mirror work is the most effective method she found for learning to love yourself and see the world as a safe and loving place. I encourage you to read this post on What is Mirror Work?

Private Coaching

Why do I believe in the power of private coaching?

Because it is truly life-changing. When your coach asks you that mind-blowing question that suddenly allows you to see what you've been missing all along that was literally right in front of your face.

You just need someone with a different perspective to help you see it.

Are you ready to experience life from a different perspective?

Find Balance Digital Download
Overcoming Self-Doubt

Overcoming Self-Doubt

What has you talking to yourself in ugly ways? C’mon, friend, you know that ugly talk. What “shoulds” are you telling yourself? Is all this chatter in your mind true, or are they your thoughts?

Where is the chatter coming from? 

Begin to pay attention to the areas in your life where self-doubt comes up for you. What ugly thoughts are going on in your brain?

Additionally, are you able to pinpoint any patterns of your self-doubt? After all, overcoming self-doubt requires us to consciously become aware of the chatter going on in our minds.

Perfectionism

Do you find yourself stuck in perfectionism? Once you notice that you’re thinking, “if I just do, it will be perfect.” 

Here’s the big secret that’s not true, perfect is only a thought. Done will beat perfect in a race every day. In other words, done is better than perfect. 

Despite the desire for perfection, a key to overcoming self-doubt is letting go and accepting that your best is good enough and done is better than perfect. 

Overcoming Self-Doubt

Failure

I can almost hear you thinking I do not like getting things wrong or failing. Here’s the bottom line it is okay to fail.

Overcoming self-doubt will require a change in mindset regarding our perception of failure. Look at failure as redirection. Failure will be your feedback to get on the right track. Think of it more are rerouting you for a change in direction.

Self-Compassion

Practice self-compassion when your thoughts take you into a spiral of self-doubt. Most important, don’t be discouraged with yourself.

When your mind begins the spiral into comparing yourself to others or your overly harsh critic begins to chime in. Seeing that thinking is how you overcome your self-doubt with self-compassion.

Ugly Self-Talk

Do you know what ugly self-talk you use? Simultaneously it seems to go hand and hand with your self-doubt? You say all those nasty things to yourself that you’d never say to anyone else. Be sure to take notice of your ugly self-talk. Don’t beat yourself up over it. Instead, write it down along with how you’ll overcome the self-doubt next time. Set a better intention for yourself. 

While it will get easier to notice your thoughts of self-doubt, it is not a one-and-done activity. Undeniably, you will have times when you’ll be disappointed. Your ugly, doubting self will be right there to make you feel crappy. Regardless, how you rebound from it is vital.

You will feel overwhelmed with life; that’s normal. We all feel that way.

Still remain focused on questioning your self-doubt. Rejoice and be proud of yourself when you notice your thoughts. This is feedback to you.

The best thing you can do is create a plan for handling these thought setbacks when they arise. They will come. When they do have a plan to manage your ugly thoughts regarding your self-doubt.

Ultimately, get an encouragement partner. The cheerful voice in your ear for when you do not have the strength to overcome your self-doubt.

In the end, self-doubt is worrying about what may or may not happen.

I’ll leave you with this verse from Matthew 6:27 NLT to ponder. Can all your worries add a single moment to your life?

Private Coaching

Why do I believe in the power of private coaching?

Because it is truly life-changing. When your coach asks you that mind-blowing question that suddenly allows you to see what you've been missing all along that was literally right in front of your face.

You just need someone with a different perspective to help you see it.

Are you ready to experience life from a different perspective?

Find Balance Digital Download