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Overcoming Self-Doubt

Overcoming Self-Doubt

What has you talking to yourself in ugly ways? C’mon, friend, you know that ugly talk. What “shoulds” are you telling yourself? Is all this chatter in your mind true, or are they your thoughts?

Where is the chatter coming from? 

Begin to pay attention to the areas in your life where self-doubt comes up for you. What ugly thoughts are going on in your brain?

Additionally, are you able to pinpoint any patterns of your self-doubt? After all, overcoming self-doubt requires us to consciously become aware of the chatter going on in our minds.

Perfectionism

Do you find yourself stuck in perfectionism? Once you notice that you’re thinking, “if I just do, it will be perfect.” 

Here’s the big secret that’s not true, perfect is only a thought. Done will beat perfect in a race every day. In other words, done is better than perfect. 

Despite the desire for perfection, a key to overcoming self-doubt is letting go and accepting that your best is good enough and done is better than perfect. 

Overcoming Self-Doubt

Failure

I can almost hear you thinking I do not like getting things wrong or failing. Here’s the bottom line it is okay to fail.

Overcoming self-doubt will require a change in mindset regarding our perception of failure. Look at failure as redirection. Failure will be your feedback to get on the right track. Think of it more are rerouting you for a change in direction.

Self-Compassion

Practice self-compassion when your thoughts take you into a spiral of self-doubt. Most important, don’t be discouraged with yourself.

When your mind begins the spiral into comparing yourself to others or your overly harsh critic begins to chime in. Seeing that thinking is how you overcome your self-doubt with self-compassion.

Ugly Self-Talk

Do you know what ugly self-talk you use? Simultaneously it seems to go hand and hand with your self-doubt? You say all those nasty things to yourself that you’d never say to anyone else. Be sure to take notice of your ugly self-talk. Don’t beat yourself up over it. Instead, write it down along with how you’ll overcome the self-doubt next time. Set a better intention for yourself. 

While it will get easier to notice your thoughts of self-doubt, it is not a one-and-done activity. Undeniably, you will have times when you’ll be disappointed. Your ugly, doubting self will be right there to make you feel crappy. Regardless, how you rebound from it is vital.

You will feel overwhelmed with life; that’s normal. We all feel that way.

Still remain focused on questioning your self-doubt. Rejoice and be proud of yourself when you notice your thoughts. This is feedback to you.

The best thing you can do is create a plan for handling these thought setbacks when they arise. They will come. When they do have a plan to manage your ugly thoughts regarding your self-doubt.

Ultimately, get an encouragement partner. The cheerful voice in your ear for when you do not have the strength to overcome your self-doubt.

In the end, self-doubt is worrying about what may or may not happen.

I’ll leave you with this verse from Matthew 6:27 NLT to ponder. Can all your worries add a single moment to your life?

Private Coaching

Why do I believe in the power of private coaching?

Because it is truly life-changing. When your coach asks you that mind-blowing question that suddenly allows you to see what you've been missing all along that was literally right in front of your face.

You just need someone with a different perspective to help you see it.

Are you ready to experience life from a different perspective?

Find Balance Digital Download
Stuck In Comparison

Stuck In Comparison

It’s funny; while we know comparison is the thief of joy, why do we still get stuck in comparison. After all, has comparing yourself to someone else moved you forward by leaps and bounds? 

How you see yourself

Often we do not step back to see ourselves as others see us. In truth, others can see our strengths easier than we can. 

One of my very favorite phrases is you can’t read the label from inside the bottle. 

Our minds are happy in the bottle; they feel safe and comfortable. 

Even if it keeps us stuck in comparison. 

While stuck in comparison 

Can you think of a time when you were comparing yourself to someone else, fueled by your ugly thought about yourself? Am I right?

Honestly, how does that feel? I’m guessing pretty crappy. Or maybe that’s just me that feels like my ugly thoughts drag me through the mud sometimes. 

How would it feel instead?

Instead of staying stuck in comparison looking at others, would it be better to decide to be content with what you have and what you’ve accomplished? 

We have no idea what obstacles they have overcome along the path for the most part. Because we are comparing ourselves to who they have already become. 

Not to mention, we do not know their journey; we can not compare ourselves to someone else’s with missing information. Likely, we are seeing only the good stuff. We do not know all the struggles they worked through to get to where they are now. 

Stuck In Comparison

Get Unstuck

You must be wondering how to get unstuck. The solution is simple start comparing yourself to your own self. 

How does that change your thinking when you see yourself as your greatest competitor?

I think you’ll agree with me when I say that it causes discontent with our own lives when we look outside ourselves.

And this is where people run into trouble; somehow, you think your life doesn’t look as good as someone else's.

After all, I genuinely believe that our path is full of lessons to learn in this lifetime.

”Comparison is the thief of joy.” – Theodore Roosevelt

Choice

What if you choose every day to be happy and celebrate yourself and your progress? How would that change your world for you?

Why not look at how far you’ve come on your path toward your goals verse stuck in comparison.  Choosing to be happy with your progress will, in turn, push you farther ahead on your journey.

Without a doubt, the goals you want to achieve were put on our hearts for a reason.

Instead of staying stuck in comparison, look at what you’re working to achieve. Praise your progress. Look for the joy in your progress.

Do you want to look back on your life with regret because you did not take the time to embrace happiness in the little moments? Or would you like to choose right now to stop comparing yourself to others? The choice is always in your court. 

Find Balance Digital Download

Private Coaching

Why do I believe in the power of private coaching?

Because it is truly life-changing. When your coach asks you that mind-blowing question that suddenly allows you to see what you've been missing all along that was literally right in front of your face.

You just need someone with a different perspective to help you see it.

Are you ready to experience life from a different perspective?

Little Tiny Decisions

Little Tiny Decisions

Take a moment and think about all the little tiny decisions you’ve made today. The good, bad, and the ugly little decisions that you made and probably didn’t give it a second thought. Do you know how all those little tiny decisions are adding up to have a long-term effect on your life?

Negative little tiny decisions add up

All the tiny decisions we make at the moment do not seem like much. The five dollars here or twenty dollars there. An extra bar or cookie to get you through the afternoon slump. Just one more episode of the latest binge-worthy TV show. All of those negative little tiny decisions at the moment will add up to negatively impact our lives in the long run.

Making negative little decisions will compound over time. We try to think that they won’t but they do. Those little tiny decisions compound into extra weight, decreased physical health, or missing a saving goal you’ve set for yourselves.

For me personally, an area that is a point of frustration is my little purchases. Amazon makes it so easy for me to spend five-dollar here or twenty dollars there. Thoughtless purchases that in the end do not add to my overall joy or happiness in my life.

Add up to overall stress

In fact, those impulsive purchases that at the moment I didn’t think much about and in the end actually add to my overall stress. Once I make that little tiny decision to buy now what other decisions will I need to make once it’s in my home? Will I truly love it or will it end up in the donation pile along with the guilt of money poorly spent. 

Do you see how little tiny decisions can add up to clutter in our homes and in our minds?

The regret lingers long after the action is done.

Little Tiny Decisions

What to do instead

As part of my self-coaching practice. I’m writing down all my negative little tiny decisions. Followed by, writing down what I will do next time instead.

Here is one of my entries, maybe you’ll be able to relate, maybe not.

I wish I hadn’t eaten the second bar. Now I feel sick. Next time, I’m going to pause. Remind me that one was so satisfying and it’s my thoughts trying to trick me. My thoughts. I’m good with just one bar. I’m proud of myself for saying no and sticking to only one.

Why write it down? 

By writing this down and what I want I’ll do next time. I'm working to reframe the way I think. In Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP) this is called a pattern interrupt.

What I’m doing is interrupting my current pattern of thinking to make what I feel are better little tiny decisions.

Even as I think about making better decisions I feel lighter, happier, at peace. It’s the feeling I want to carry with me all day long, every day.

Do you have areas in your life where your little decisions are starting to add up on you?

Are they adding up for the positive or the negative?

Have you given any thought to how they make you feel?

If you need that encouraging voice in your ear, the private coach to help you interrupt your current thought patterns. I invite you to apply to work with me. Here is the link

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Little Side Note

Waiting to Start? Procrastination Is Your Obstacle this is the topic for next week, be sure to mark your calendar or subscribe here to be notified.

✁ Just a Snippet 

Here is just a snippet of the important points, you know for the skimmer in you. 🤪

  • The good, bad, and the ugly little decisions that you made and probably didn’t give it a second thought
  • All of those negative little tiny decisions at the moment will add up to negatively impact our lives in the long run.
  • Those little tiny decisions compound into extra weight, decreased physical health, or missing a saving goal you’ve set for yourselves.
  • Little tiny decisions can add up to clutter in our homes and in our minds
  • Write down all my negative little tiny decisions. Followed by, writing down what you will do next time instead.
  • What I’m doing is interrupting my current pattern of thinking to make what I feel are better little tiny decisions.

Private Coaching

Why do I believe in the power of private coaching?

Because it is truly life-changing. When your coach asks you that mind-blowing question that suddenly allows you to see what you've been missing all along that was literally right in front of your face.

You just need someone with a different perspective to help you see it.

Are you ready to experience life from a different perspective?

Find Balance Digital Download