When was the last time that you slowed down enough to appreciate your life and be happy right now with what you have at the present moment? 

Let me ask, with the constant go, go, go of everyday life do you pause to enjoy what you’ve accomplished? Do you think that you should have things right now, and you don't necessarily wanna go through all the steps that you need to get there? Have you stopped to think about how that affects your happiness? 

Do you find yourself chasing happiness? How often do you find yourself putting your happiness out into the future? When you have ABC or XYZ then you’ll be happy. Or when you do that thing, you’ll be happy. 

The problem is that may not necessarily be true because if you're not happy right now with yourself, how will that change? Think back to a time in your past, I’m only guessing that you’ve had that exact thought about something else. When you got that “thing” how long did your happiness last until you became discontent with your life again? 

Friend, I’m not throwing any stone here. I get it. In the past, I too was a discontent person. Instead of appreciating my life and all my blessings, I was on the hamster wheel chasing happiness. It wasn’t until I realized that my thoughts and feeling drove my actions that created my results. 

Do you believe that it is possible to be happy right now? 

What are you saying to yourself that makes you believe you're not happy right now? Do you watch the words that you say to yourself? Are you hiding a mean girl inside that doesn’t want you to be happy right now? 

Hey, I have a mean girl that likes to play small. These days I keep her under control with the reminder that what she's doing is enough or that she is happy with herself right now. I finally understood that she can spiral out of control pretty quickly without self-nurturing. 

Are you able to relate to me on this? I'm guessing you do if you’re searching the topic of how can you be happy right now.  

Believe it or not, you have the power to control your thoughts. 

I can almost hear you thinking, nope no way I have the power to control my thoughts. That may be true of the first thought and you can always control your second thought. 

Now, this is important you really do need to manage your feelings. You need to manage the thoughts that you have about yourselves. 

Because that in turn is going to lead us down a path of being happier. How do I know? Because I was that person. 

Let me tell you that's where I started. That's why I’m so passionate that everyone needs life coaching, if that’s me great, if not find that life coach that you feel drawn to. 

You see, I was telling myself that I didn’t need a life coach. When I took the leap to hire my first life coach, she was able to help me down the path. She walked right alongside me asking all the right questions, allowing me to see how my thoughts were and what was causing my discontentment, my unhappiness with myself, my progress, and overall life. 

Looking back now, the solution was simple I was not understanding that my thoughts were making me unhappy with myself and my life in general. Here’s the big secret it’s difficult to actually read the label when you're stuck inside the bottle.

Are you stuck in the bottle? 

Don’t you wish that you got it all the time? I know I don't get it all the time. Do you have those negative feelings that are in there that you are trying to manage on your own? 

Well, you need to actually take a look at why you have those negative feelings. Why are your negative feeling and thought coming up inside you, what is the cause? What is actually causing those feelings to lead you to not be happy with who you are and what you have right now in this present moment? 

Are you busy looking over there? 

Are you a goal setter? I know, I sure like to set goals. But, there’s a catch when you set the goal you need to release the attachment to the outcome. If you hold on to the attachment of the outcome you’ll be busy looking over there for your happiness. 

You know what I mean right. I'm gonna be happy when I get to that goal or I'm gonna be happy when I make this impact on this many people.

But truly,  is that what's gonna make you happy? Always looking over there? Nope, looking over there for your happiness will lead you to feel unhappiness in the present moment. 

Despite your thought that you’ll be happy when you’ve reached your goal, likely when you get to whatever your goal is, you’ll gonna be looking too far ahead to what your next goal should be.

Always busy looking over there, rather than stepping back and really looking at all you have right now to be happy about.

Here’s a trigger for me

Oh friend, let me give you my real-life example of one of my triggers. It has to do with my husband. When we're in the car, he will start chewing a piece of gum. While he thinks it's super cool to snap his gum really loud, like extremely loud I’m not having the same thought of “oh that’s so cool that you can snap your gum extremely loud.” Anyone who knows my husband knows that he is super competitive, to him, he is passing the time by competing with himself to see if he can snap his gum louder and louder. 

For some reason the louder he snaps the more it triggers me. Something about that noise triggers me and I usually go off the wall, until recently, now I pause before I go off the wall. 

I turn inwards to examine my thoughts. Questioning why something so fun to him derails my peace. I'm aware of my feelings, my thoughts, and my beliefs, when I feel myself going a little bit crazy, instead of being irritated with him, I'm taking a step back and ask why does this trigger me?

It is pretty silly, that I let something that he likes to do and he thinks is cool, steal my peace of mind. Not everybody thinks the same things are cool in life. Am I right with that?

What steals your peace of mind? 

Are you able to think of something that triggers you? Whatever it is, next time you feel yourself going a little crazy step back and look at what’s triggering you. What do you allow to cause you to not be happy right now with yourself and not be happy in the present moment? 

Are you able to think of an example? What are those things for you? Despite your best efforts what makes you not want to be happy? How could you better manage those feelings around it? Are you paying attention? 

Journaling is thought discovery

Are you one that will journal? If you have the opportunity to journal, when you're in the present moment of being triggered, truthfully take a look at what you're thinking, what are the feelings that you have behind it?

Where do you feel that in your body? Because those are great things to have awareness of. 

When you become aware, then you can make changes. Because you know what's happening in your mind and in your body that makes you unhappy. At this instant, you’re able to take that learning and use it to be happy with yourself.

You can be happy with your life, because really, in the end, don't you want to have a happy, fun life? I don't know about you, but that feels good to me. 

I'm curious, tell me in the comments below, what are the things that you either find triggering or what are the things that bring you joy in life?

In order to be happy right now

How can you be happy right now? In order to be happy you need to discover what are the things that make you feel happy. Have you actually sat down to figure out what it is that makes you truly happy so that, you know, when you're there, or maybe you're just passing over all those little moments in your life that actually bring you joy and happiness because you're too much in a hurry to not pay attention to the little things? Why not slow down, honestly look at the things that, you know, bring you happiness, and do a little bit more of those. 

Thank you so much for your time. I appreciate you. I hope you have a wonderful week and I look forward to seeing you next week. Oh by the way, if you're needing that private coach in your corner to help you see all the little joyful things and reach those goals, I would love to work with you. The link to my private coaching application is down below.

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Mentally tired after a long day in meetings, I wandered to the kitchen, grabbing another Copycat Chilled Crumbl Sugar Cookie. After polishing it off, I uttered, “What’s wrong with me?” Ugh, those ugly words judging the decision. Let me ask, have you ever uttered to yourself what's wrong with me?

Maybe it is self-judgment? 

First off, nothing is wrong with me, and nothing is wrong with you. Instead, it’s our tunnel vision. Our self-judgment causes this belief. We get so focused on the end outcome or the goal that we've set for ourselves. 

But, here’s the thing, whether you're aiming at losing a little weight or struggling to start a business, or working to save money, whatever that goal or outcome is. If you have a little bit of emotional attachment to achieving, the self-judgment seems to kick in. 

Are you a gap thinker? 

You think that happiness and success are something you pursue and you'll have in the future. What's wrong with me? That's gap thinking. You're always thinking that nothing is good enough and that you're not accepting you for you. 

It is as if you think the clouds will part, the sun is gonna shine down on you. You’ll suddenly hear that angelical sound from the heavens come down at you. 

When you decide to focus on loving the process and the progress that puts you in the immediate effects of the gain. 

So the book goes on to explain it's human nature for us to be in the gap and the gain is the antidote. You see, the gain creates immediate happiness. Matter of fact, the gain connects you to yourself and your own progress. The gain transforms everything it gives you power over the direction of your life. Here’s how it works: the gain gets you out of the gap.

Again, if you've not read this book, get it on your reading list today. And Hey, if you've already read it, read it again, because it's that good.

The power of belief

What if, instead of dwelling on the long list that you've created in your mind of what's wrong with you? What if instead, you take away the power of that belief?

This is important, what if you commit to focusing on your progress, focus on the process, and focus on the person that you are working to become.

For instance, if you told yourself the story is I'm working towards (insert that personal goal) that you've set for yourself.

If you are looking for that person that has your back, I invite you to apply for my private coaching. The link is here down below.

Should you find yourself questioning “What’s wrong with me?” remember that you have the power to change your thinking. Nothing is wrong with you, it’s simply time for self-awareness. Notice when this thought comes up and change the story you’re telling yourself.

Fortunately, there’s a simple solution: pull out your journal to examine why you made the decision you made. Once you discover the decision driver, figure out how you will handle it in the future. Pre decides what you will do next time when faced with a similar situation.

I appreciate you. I hope you have a wonderful week and I'll see you back here next week.

Disappointment in yourselves, right? We've all been there. Some of us a little bit more than others. What if you choose to feel the disappointment and look for what it shows you. 

What are you talking about, Michele?

Now I get your confusion around “feeling” disappointment. Heck, pretty sure up until I deep-dived into thoughts and feelings that caused my actions that created results, I walked around ignoring what I was truly thinking and feeling. You’re preaching to the choir. It’s okay because this took me a little bit myself to get.

What the heck does that mean?

Yeah. Right? What does that mean? When I’m feeling disappointed in myself, this tends to come up when I'm dwelling on the past.

When I’m disappointed and stuck in the past, dwelling on something that I have zero ability to change, where does that show up in my body? Trust me; once you focus your attention like actually pay attention to your body, you’ll begin to notice the physical sensation of how disappointment feels in your body.

As you’re paying attention, the physical feeling comes up. Sit with it; let it be there. Take notice, say, Hey Disappointment, I see you.

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Feel the Disappointment

Here’s the thing I was constantly thinking about the next thing, never pausing to sit and acknowledge that I was disappointed. 

Here’s the interesting part, you'll physically feel it somewhere in your body. It’s the quiet, muted feel. You must be wondering what I mean; it’s the feeling of butterflies when you are nervous. Or that pit you feel in your stomach. That’s what I mean. 

Here’s why that's important when you do take notice, that will be how it shows up again. 

Then, you’ll be like oh hey, disappointment. Let’s go ahead and feel you. Let’s go ahead and honor that you’re feeling disappointed. You’ll feel it in your body, let the feeling run entirely through you, and then dissipate. 

I know what you’re thinking; yes, you'll know exactly what I mean when you pay attention to how it shows up and feels in your body. 

Now, let it go

As you visualize your disappointment, watch as you slowly let it go until the last tiny thread is released from your hands. Watch it float gently away from you. Can you see that? 

Are you seeing it float away from you in your mind? 

That's how I vision when I'm letting go of something, how that floats gently away as if it’s a piece of fabric in the wind. Feel the disappointment in your body and let it flow through you like a sheer piece of fabric, visualize and let that float beautifully away from you. 

As you're watching that fabric float gently away from you next, write out what you are choosing to feel instead of disappointment in yourself. 

Examine Your Disappointment

Where have you been disappointed with yourself? Step back into that time. I want you to feel what you are feeling.

I want you to hear what you heard, was somebody speaking with you? Were you talking out loud to yourself? Were you just talking to yourself in your brain? 

What were your thoughts and your feelings, and what did you hear? 

I'm only guessing your self-talk was not bright and cheery when you were disappointed in yourselves. It’s never is bright and cheerful self-talk. Let me guess; it was negative and mean. Words that you would never speak to your sister, friends, or daughter. 

When you’re disappointed in yourself, it may be because you have an exceptionally high standard for yourselves. I don't know about you, but I know I fall into that trap. Don’t get me wrong; high standards are a good thing. The problem is those exceptionally high standards are shooting for the moon. When you do not land on the moon, you choose to feel disappointment in yourself versus celebrating the small successes. 

It all boils down to this disappointment is only a thought that you have about yourself. Rather than holding onto that thought of disappointment. What if you let that emotion wash through you, let the disappointment be fleeting. Let it be a fleeting thought that goes away. As quickly as it comes, look at why you're thinking and feeling disappointed. Is it because you expect perfection, so aim for what you perceive as perfection and be happy with excellence. 

Above all, look at disappointment as a redirection for where you need to go. If you find you're stuck in disappointment, do a mind sweep of all of the thoughts and feelings you have that are causing you to feel disappointed in yourself. 

What is one small action you can take to put you on the right path to a better thought and a better feeling? Look at your disappointment from a neutral place.

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Remove the label

What is the label? Is it good, or is it bad? Good and bad, those are labels. Labels you put on things are either good or bad. 

It's just someone stating the news to you. Although this may be true, remove your own emotional biased; you were created with free will. You can use your free will to move you out of disappointment, or you can use it to keep you stuck in the thoughts of disappointment. Know that you get to choose what you think and your following action. 

Suppose you need that person in your corner to help you work through your disappointment and the things you have going on in your life and someone to be there to help you move forward to the next best action.I invite you to apply for my private coaching. Here is the link. 

I appreciate you. Thank you so much for your time, and I'll see you back here next week.